"Meditation is our effort to align with the evolving and unfolding of life's energy."
In his book Practicing the Here and Now, Herb K. offers a framework for understanding and accessing the powerful gifts of prayer and meditation found in the Twelve Step journey of recovery. Many of us are familiar with reading daily meditations in books like Twenty-Four Hours a Day. Herb helps us understand what it means to embrace meditation as a deeply spiritual practice.
According to him, "Meditation is not just about stress reduction, feeling good, or especially making notes for quotable quotes. It's not about becoming something or someone: not a good meditator, and certainly not an enlightened being. Meditation is about becoming awake to the contact with the Mystery, Power, Spirit, [and] Guidance that already exists, and becoming fully conscious of our inherent oneness."
In this excerpt, the author describes the practice of meditation recommended in Step Eleven: "Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out." Herb offers a vision of meditation as an intentional process that allows us to receive guidance from our Higher Power—however we define it—that both informs and transforms our lives and relationships.
This episode of Recovery Road originally aired in May of 2021. The excerpt has been edited for brevity.
Most people, especially those awake to the need for a spiritual path, agree that meditation is very important. But very few people actually have a consistent practice. I believe their essential problem is that they have not established a real and personal value proposition for themselves. People won't do meditation just because they "should," or just because they're committed Twelve Steppers, or it is time to work Step Eleven, or their sponsor suggests it. They will do it only when they establish a visceral value for doing it.
If you want a practice of meditation, establish a real value that is experience-based, and then begin practicing. As you will see, you can start by committing to just one minute a day of Intentional Consciousness. This is not reading or praying. This is asking for our thoughts to be directed, and then thinking and listening to our thoughts as the direction.
One minute each day for thirty days. If you miss a day, start the count over. It may take ninety days to get there. But when you do, you will have begun a practice, will have developed the beginnings of a habit, will have started a journey that will change your life if continued.
What does it mean to have a practice? Years ago, as I started my journey of transformation through the Twelve Steps, I made a commitment to seek Power through a meditation practice. But it was unsatisfying. I was frustrated with the perceived emptiness of my fifteen-minute sit each morning for a whole year.
I spoke with my spiritual director and, although not in a Twelve Step program, he understood mine, and he got Step One. He remarked that I was making my meditation a task to be accomplished, whereas it is a process to be experienced. He suggested I was trying to make something happen: to become spiritual, to become a good meditator.
"Herb, listen, please," he said. "The spiritual life is not like that; meditation doesn't respond like that. Think these thoughts: I am as powerless over my spiritual life as I am over alcohol—having no power at all. And, I am as powerless over my meditation as I am over alcohol—having no power at all. Sit in the Presence of Power humbled by your personal powerlessness. Your job is the effort. The results will be what they are."
Wow! That helped me drop the cement coat of responsibility for making spirituality happen. I am responsible for the effort. The results will take care of themselves. Freedom!
He continued: "There are only two mistakes you can make in meditation: not show up! and leave early! Everything in between is none of your business."
Before I left his office that day, he suggested, "If you want to know if your meditation practice is effective, after three months of consistent daily practice, ask your wife how you are treating her; pay attention to how you are driving on the highways; watch how you interact with retail personnel or food servers at restaurants. A consistent meditation practice will change you: you'll be more aware, more sensitive, kinder, more compassionate, less reactive, and more responsive."
What are some of the keys to meditation? Meditation is not a method. It is an attitude of being awake, hopeful, expectant; yet patient. Being grateful and compassionate. Being forgiving (or willing to be). Being present in the moment, present to the Presence.
In humility, we meditate, knowing ourselves to be all too human. In gratitude, we are thankful that we're able to meditate at all.
We meditate to invite the Spirit of the Universe to inform us, to conform us, and to inevitably transform us. This is a process of turning—from the bondage of self-centeredness to the freedom of other-centeredness.
Most spiritual traditions suggest that sincere seekers have three components to their journey. Consider these as you start or continue your own:
A path. Look for a method you resonate with, one that is simple, that makes common sense, and for which there is actual evidence that it works and achieves the purpose for your interest.
A teacher. Find someone who has experience that can shed light on the path, guide you, and who can help with accountability. It might be someone from your Twelve Step program or from your spiritual tradition, if you have one. Learn from that person's experience: successes and mistakes.
A community. All humans are social animals and do better when connected. As pilgrims on this lonely path of consciousness development, we find encouragement, support, and even opportunities for service in the context of a likeminded community. This can be your Twelve Step support groups, a spiritual community, or both, with daily, weekly, monthly, or periodic group functions.
What about posture and position? Prayer and meditation are not about ritual. They are about attention: what are we thinking, wanting, needing? They are about intention: what is our attitude, our motive, our consciousness?
As for physical posture, some people sit in a chair or on a cushion. Some people stand or kneel. We don't stand or kneel to get God's attention; we stand or kneel to get our attention. Standing is a position of respect; kneeling is a posture of humility. My Step guide said he knelt to pray as an act of subordination, embodying his powerlessness and need of Power.
When sitting, most teachers recommend:
body relaxed, back straight, feet on the floor
hands comfortably in the lap, palms up or down
eyes closed, open, or half open—be comfortable
breathing in and out: slow, deep, deliberate, gentle, rhythmic, conscious
mind open, aware, undefended, with attention, acknowledging Presence: our own faith decision, choice, concept
heart (will, spirit) open, loving, and with intention, consenting to the invitation, the energy, and the action of the Reality in whose Presence we are sitting
In the words of Rabbi Heschel, "We don't meditate to become good meditators; we meditate to improve our conscious contact with G_d." (Heschel honored the Jewish tradition of referring to the deity only indirectly.)
Meditation is our effort to align with the evolving and unfolding of life's energy. We need to be still and listen to this silent flow of energy. We need to dial in and place our awareness on the frequency of this energy flow.
I like the analogy of the battery-driven golf cart. All day long the job of the golf cart is to deliver golfers to the various tees. At night it is hooked up to a battery charger to restore power. Without that, the golf cart will be useless the next day, unable to fulfill its purpose. All night, it sits passively absorbing power. The next day, it is ready for service.
About the Author: Herb K. was given the gift of freedom from alcohol February 21, 1984. As a result of the application of the Twelve Steps as contained precisely in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, he experienced a profound spiritual awakening in 1988. Since then he has been very involved in carrying the message of recovery through presentations, facilitating workshops, and leading retreats.
Herb has authored two books to help people access the instructions and confirm the actual process contained in the Big Book for experiencing a spiritual awakening: Twelve-Step Guide to Using the Alcoholics Anonymous Big Book (2004) and Twelve Steps to Spiritual Awakening: Enlightenment for Everyone (2010).
Live in the here and now you have to want ot let go and stop obseesing on that which you have no control over others! Let it go move on you gottawanna be free.
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