When I first came to Al-Anon, I was lost. My life revolved around someone else's drinking. I spent my days trying to fix, control, or rescue them, but nothing worked. I felt alone, exhausted, and full of fear. I didn’t understand that I was living in the chaos of active alcoholism, and I had no idea how to pull back from that insanity.
Then I met my sponsor and found my home group. They showed me, by their example, how to live a different way. They helped me understand the 2nd Tradition of Al-Anon:
"For our group purpose, there is but one authority—a loving God as He may express Himself in our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern."
At first, I didn’t get it. I thought I had to be in charge, to take control, or nothing would change. But my sponsor and home group lived this Tradition in a way that helped me see the truth.
Letting Go of Control
My sponsor, Sarah, never told me what to do. That was new for me—I was used to people giving advice, arguing, or trying to push their opinions. Instead, she listened. When she shared, she talked about her own experience, not about what I should do. She trusted that a loving God, not her personal ideas, would guide me.
She also showed me that Al-Anon is not about one person being in charge. No one in the group ran things like a boss. Instead, we made decisions together. We prayed, we listened, and we trusted that the group conscience—the collective wisdom of all of us, guided by a Higher Power—would lead us in the right direction.
Watching my home group work together helped me understand that I wasn’t supposed to control anyone else’s life—not the alcoholic’s and not anyone else’s. Just like the group trusted God to guide them, I could trust God to guide me.
Finding Unity with Others Who Chose Sanity
Before Al-Anon, I felt like I had to stand alone. I thought if I didn’t hold everything together, everything would fall apart. But my home group taught me that I didn’t have to do this alone.
I watched people who had been where I was—people who had once lived in fear, chaos, and control—now living in peace. They had pulled back from the insanity of active alcoholism, and they were staying connected with others who wanted a healthier life.
Instead of arguing with the alcoholic or trying to force change, they focused on their own recovery. They leaned on their Higher Power, worked the Steps, and found peace, no matter what the alcoholic was doing.
By staying close to my home group, I learned to do the same. I stopped trying to control things I couldn't fix. I started trusting that God would take care of what I couldn't. And I found unity with people who were choosing sanity, just like me.
Living the 2nd Tradition in My Own Life
The more I watched my sponsor and home group, the more I understood how to live the 2nd Tradition in my own life. I stopped believing that I had to be the one in charge. I learned to trust in a power greater than myself. I found peace in group decisions, instead of pushing my own way.
Most of all, I found people who were pulling back from the chaos of active alcoholism—people who, like me, were tired of living in fear and ready to choose a new path.
Through their example, I learned that I wasn’t alone. I didn’t have to stay stuck in the insanity of someone else’s drinking. I had a choice, and I could live a life of peace, guided by a loving Higher Power and supported by a group of people who understood.
Today, I am grateful for my sponsor and my home group. They didn’t just tell me what to do. They showed me how to live a better way. Because of them, I am no longer lost in the madness of active alcoholism. I am free to live in peace, unity, and trust—one day at a time.
You gottawanna be free I love you be well travel safe
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